William Smart - You May know the names

Kindly explain

@First I would like to apologize for being outwardly upset when I posted how I felt. I usually do not behave in this manner. I was working on my family tree as a gift for my family as well as picking up where my Aunt left off, as she passed. Being new, I had a lot to learn. I found that I was extremely excited on this journey I found myself on. I spent hours, I'm sure like every one else. I have siblings and my mother who I haven't had contact with since I was 11. While putting the pieces slowly together, stumbling along the way, I found my mother's half sister and my half sister. But I also discovered some things which were sensitive wanting to share them with family members before they discovered what I had. Meanwhile I was rechecking and fixing mistakes I had made when I came in contact with an individual due to a question I had. Next thing I knew I was cuz this and cuz that. which was a little overwhelming but her excitement had me excited too. Although I wasn't ready for being a relative to a stranger I could understand her excitement. Instantly She wanted to merge our trees. I politely told her I needed to redo some entries and I had to discuss this with family members ,I also needed to inform the issues I had discovered as well. I was also in contact with other family members who were assisting me who suggested I hold off until we could receive more detailed info which we were waiting for. Upon returning to fill in more data I discovered some how my family tree was being managed not only by this person but informed me that Geni would separate our trees, which was not true. I was extremely upset as I watched my adventure being pulled out from under me. I realize some of the information is public, but once she discovered what part of the tree I was from she ran inconsiderately disrespecting more than my pride. Believe me I'm sure many rolled over in their graves while I'm left with being informed I was careless. I tried very hard to control my behavior and my tongue, something which is extremely difficult to do. It's a Smart thing. Every where I go to work on my tree this person has her name on it . I'm sure you see me as being childish or whatever else. That's okay I can live with that. But I get upset every time I open my email or go to enter info I get slapped in the face as if my nose is being rubbed in my own stupidity. That hurts.
For me I was so excited to be able to take over my aunt's journey and adding to it as she would want. I'm upset because I discovered how much I loved being on this adventure which gave me more than I could have imagined. Even despite some things I learned which were heartbreaking. It was my story, and now it has been striped from me. It was my gift , no longer is it so. The honor I was given, now has been treated with no respect. Yes I am the blame for being ignorant as to the protocol but to be taken advantage of is well, it is what it is.

My meaning as to the names and not the history, that also has left us as nothing more than a name and dates. I am new to this, and I have lots to learn, and still want to learn. But I won't be treated as if I am stupid for being trusting as I was. It's not about just names and dates for me it's about those who came before us and who they really were. It's about who we are and the people which made us who we are.
It's about family, something I have lived my entire life searching for.

So again I apologize for my disrespectful childish behavior, I will not behave in such a manner again. It's not the honorable thing to do.
Sincerely, Deborah Ose [Smart]

PS I am curious as to whom I am responding to. For me it is not about when and where, it's about who, what and why. It became a very personal journey, with faces in my mind and how life was to those before me. I want to learn and know each member as I have hoped to do, without them I wouldn't be here . Like you I need to know where I came from, but I also want to enjoy what was an incredible journey I began a few months ago. Forgive me for rambling but that too is a Smart thing.

Thank you.

Deborah Jean Ose/Smart

I am a curator http://help.geni.com/entries/487543-What-are-Curators-

Some of us monitor these Public Discussions to see if we could help.

i looked at some of the profiles you manage and saw where you now co-manage them.

Do you see any problems on any of those profiles?

I told I would be co-manager if I decided to merge the trees I never agreed I would I told this person that I had to get back to her about it, it was very important that I had to tell a few family members what I had learned and I needed some time to fix a few mistakesI made. I wanted to ask an aunt of mine about what she thought about it since I was new at this. If I had agreed I would have wanted to manage my part of the tree, since I would have their best interest in mind. Some of the people that have passed and was working on I have had a real family connection. Knew them as being very loving people who are not only my immediate family but many close cousins, aunts and uncles. There are only 5 of us left of this generation, our children, then my grandchildren. I'm not trying to be difficult or petty I couldn't wait to share my family but not until I had fixed and learned more of what I thought was needed to give my loved ones more than just a name and date.

The one thing I have learned is that everyone I have looked up, called emailed or whatever I thought would open a door have been kind and extremely happy to share their stories contributing there part. Some were excited to learn someone was taking an interest in this whole thing, they were afraid this generation wouldn't care enough to continue adding to our tree. Do you know how that made me feel ? I was so honored not only was I going to enjoy my journey my Aunt Charlotte started but I was trusted to carry on what they had started. So I guess finding someone who took advantage of me well wasn't the Smart thing to do, nor was it a kind thing to do. Maybe I'm wrong to feel as I do or see it differently but I felt played. I felt my family was thrown all over the place just for the glory and head count. Not for the honor and respect. Heck some of these people changed my diapers, listened to me laugh and cry. At one moment in time there were 4 generations, my children made the 5th. At the family reunion my children were the guest of honor for that part of the family. So no we are not names and dates, we are a family who have all the quirks, squabbles and some disfunctional ways that make up a real family. I just want to have had the opportunity
. to honor them. Like I said most of them are gone but to see them here on the web makes the memories sweeter and in away be with them.

Thank for listening to me I just wanted my feelings and my thoughts known. Honoring my family even mor/

Debbie

SMART merges discussion Deborah Smart/Ose
To whoever and all, whom it may concern.

I was deeply saddened, by the "you may know the names and dates, but not the stories" post... as I really was just trying to find family, too which has also, been a critically important quest in my life, for the past 14 years... Anyone, who has bothered to read my profile info or just my display name, knows that I was adopted. If you actually read me my about section, you'll see my mother never really knew her father either, yup, just names and dates.
And her grandfather(maternal), was also never around... so, yup, even more names and dates... Even got some pictures.... but unfortunately, no stories... That's true and it is a sad truth.
Which may clarify, any of my intentions or accused "tramplings"... into my fifth cousins existence.

I know it's possible to unmerge and or simply delete me, as a manager of any said profiles, which she may wish to have sole exclusivity over... And I attempted to let her know this... the best way I could...
Of course, I could just erase the common profiles and any others I may have added in and around her/our tree, that we had and start over... If she really, just doesn't want to have anything to do with me. I respect that. Although, it makes me sad.

I was also, trying to be as diplomatic and nice, as I know how to,
but apparently, somehow, I still managed to fail tragically and tremendously.

Can someone read this thread below and please, tell me, what the heck I can do, in the future to better avoid, being hurt like this and apparently, involentarily, injuring someone...

Because, I've read it several times, and still don't know, what happened.

My understanding was Geni is a collective collaboration on a One Big World Family Tree....
I never expected to be sole owner of anything, here.
And no, Deborah/her profiles on those living persons is still not in any way public...
It was because, I had been added to her family group... and she didn't seem to understand that... That didn't mean the whole world could see it... just me.

Or to be so uninvited and unwanted, by the to that date , the closest living relationship, I had found on Geni, so far... Who was (*see the messages thread below) so glad to be able to be able to say, "your lil Cuz", to me....
It is a great disappointment. And I certainly hope we are somehow, able to rectify the situation, to everyone's pleasing and appeasing.

xoxoxoxRenée

Here the original thread- Chronologically, from newest to oldest/top to bottom (or) first mails are the last mails, principle.
Dates and all are copied in, to ease in keeping in order etc.

Re: Jamima Smart (NN)
Between Deborah Jean Ose/Smart and Theresa Renée Eléna Delgado-Tossas (Tossas Cox adopted: Maculaitis)

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Theresa Renée Eléna Delgado-Tossas (Tossas Cox adopted: Maculaitis)
4/19/2014 at 3:19 PM
Happy Spring Holiday Weekend, Cuz!
Best wishes, for you and yours!
Renée

Theresa Renée Eléna Delgado-Tossas (Tossas Cox adopted: Maculaitis)
4/10/2014 at 2:42 PM
And just a small note, to ease your possible alarm, of being connected to the big tree... anyone, of your family profiles, of any living family members, remains "private" to all and anyone else, on GENI who is NOT in your "family group", Hon... not even those, with whom you "collaborate" with can see your private profiles... that is only you and me, as we are in a closer family group. That is all.

And profiles on GENI, of those "passed on before us" over 100 years of age... so to speak.... are, usually, "public", for clarity of research purposes. That has nothing to do with our collaborating or family group connection.

And the profiles, which we now "share" where you and I are both listed as managers, are also, only limited to the ones, which we both had added, at some separate point from one another, which are now "merged" and doesn´t apply to any and all of your profiles, in your tree, soley those, which we both had, already... doubled. And those which you had added earlier, than I, have become the "Main Profile" and you´re listed firstly, on these. And those which I added before you had, same, only one these, I am first listed... and the "first appeared" profile, becomes the "Main Profile".

Just seems to be, "the order of things" here on GENI, at least.

Hope that helps to explain, what happened a bit clearer and loads less, intimidatingly, than they appeared originially.

xoxoxoxRenée

Theresa Renée Eléna Delgado-Tossas (Tossas Cox adopted: Maculaitis)
4/10/2014 at 12:59 PM
Hi Deborah, you are of course, included. you´re just simply merged with my smart tree, that´s all. And I with yours. I also had added your Great Grandfather and as you had seen, Jemima, for example, now they are simply, "one". Has nothing to do with excluding anyone, whatsoever. I was also, excited to see you´d filled in Everett Redding, for example... etc. It is most definitely a collaboration, my only fear, is of you not being familiar enough with the program and disconnecting or changing something.. in an irreversable manner.

(*As, she had mentioned in my comments, too, "making a mess out of her tree and not being sure of what she was doing" ~ed.)

If you are uncomfortable, with being connected to my tree, we can ask one of the GENI assistants to help us disconnect them somehow... they should be able to do that... although, I can not.

xoxoxoxRenée

Deborah Jean Ose/Smart
4/10/2014 at 12:23 AM
I seem to have miss understood I didn't realize My profiles would be without me more or or less. I had planned to share this with my immediate family first,since it is a gift to them. Hoping to have their permission as well as their involvement.in this project. I have no problem sharing my family branch this is what is all about. But I would have like to have done this in a manner that included my family and I in opening the door. I apologize for my misunderstanding and I mean no disrespect. I am new to this and I am feeling a bit exposed right now. How this became a Geni project I have no idea, it would have been nice to have had the opportunity to share my branch openly included. I am a Smart as well, and I am sure you know us Smart's need to have our part in the bigger picture. Anyway I hope you understand I'm sincere, and I only want this journey that I have been enjoying to continue. Thank you.

Theresa Renée Eléna Delgado-Tossas (Tossas Cox adopted: Maculaitis)
4/8/2014 at 10:44 PM
Oh, and if you´d like any kind of assistance, which I may be able to provide you with, don´t hesitate to ask. I am glad we´ve found each other and so happy to be collaborating with you, on OUR Family Branches!!!

Theresa Renée Eléna Delgado-Tossas (Tossas Cox adopted: Maculaitis)
4/8/2014 at 3:28 PM
So, I´ve connected you and this is what GENI came up with! :-))

http://www.geni.com/path/Theresa+Ren%C3%A9e+El%C3%A9na+Delgado+Toss...

Please, don´t change anything on profiles, which I am manager of, unless, 99.2% certain that the info is right and sure you can make the change, without problems with the navigation of the site or questions as to the: "how one saves info and/or how whatever process, you´d like to do, works.), as I´ve made a painstaking effort, to insure accuracy, where possible. And although, it´s not nearly perfect and there is always something that turns up... that turns out to be inaccurate somewhere, with further revue or reference (Typos, Missing a line, in generations, when adding infos.. etc...) and still, I would hate to "lose" something and have to go back to re- researching. Thanks, Cuz!

BTW- when were you born, really? (surely, not 1905 lol!) what do you do, for work? I´m also, very excited to, to have a new found (and pretty dang close one, for GENI cousins!) Cousin!

xoxoxoxRenée

Deborah Jean Ose/Smart is your fifth cousin once removed.
You
→ Linda Sue Cox
your mother → Julius Elsworth Cox Sr.
her father → Samuel Elsworth Cox, Sr.
his father → Sarah Frances (Smart) Cox
his mother → Thomas Sydney/Sidney Smart
her father → Elisha Bennett Smart
his father → William Smart
his brother → Levi "Lee" David SMART
his son → Robert Lee SMART
his son → Arthur Leroy SMART
his son → FORREST WAYNE SMART
his son → Deborah Jean Ose/Smart
his daughter

Deborah Jean Ose/Smart
4/8/2014 at 1:17 AM
Working on getting my notes sorted to add to my tree. When I began this journey I had not a clue as to what I was doing. Got several trees going I wish I could manage to straighten out. You'll probably see them all over, I'm so embarrassed. Have I have another person who emailed me about Samuel Smart. i wish I would have discovered Geni before now. I am doing everything under My hertigage which has not enough options. Please bare with me, between the mess I made of my tree(s) and my computer crashing I'm playing catch up. I am genuine in all counts. I'm working feverishly to pull everything together for you. I just need to breathe and calm down to focus, I can do this. Please, forgive me, I'm a little bit nuts, but that is also, from the Smart Side of the family. :) Your, lil cuz---Oh how I love writing that!!!

Theresa Renée Eléna Delgado-Tossas (Tossas Cox adopted: Maculaitis)
4/8/2014 at 12:10 AM
Hi Deborah!

I totally, can relate!!!! (Pun may be intended at you discretion) ;-)
When you get a chance. Check out the main opening paragraphs of my "About" section.

I've also, been running like a mad- woman. lol!
Got to sleep at all, worth mentioning, every two days, for the past week.
Between live shows and pre production for a new tv show that I will compete in end of May... I'm getting a few days off next week, thank goodness.... One can only survive at this level, for so long at a time. :-)))
Please, copy me out the link to your Levi Smart, so I can merge our two trees, into one big one!!!
xoxoxo your new Cuz!

Deborah Jean Ose/Smart
4/7/2014 at 10:11 PM
I apologize for not replying sooner but the weekends here are crazy. Thank you for including me. I've only been at this for about 3 months. I am amazed how exciting researching the little I have. What started as a search for my mother, who I have not seen since I was eleven, a complete dead end. (Except for my mom's stepsister I had no idea existed). I found myself searching my fathers side. You see I had very little knowledge of either side due to an endless change in my life. I could almost write a book. I am research My fathers side: Smart My Mother's side: Dobsons And my stepfathers side: Carle. This how I found myself here. Need to run but wiil get back to you. Again thank you. Oh and it is so cool to have a new cousin. It mean so much to me:)

Theresa Renée Eléna Delgado-Tossas (Tossas Cox adopted: Maculaitis)
4/6/2014 at 3:44 PM
and here´s my path to Levi, so you can get a feel, of our new- found- relationship!!!

http://www.geni.com/path/Theresa+Renee+El%C3%A9na+Delgado+Tossas+To...

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Re: Jamima Smart (NN)
Between Deborah Jean Ose/Smart and Theresa Renée Eléna Delgado-Tossas (Tossas Cox adopted: Maculaitis)

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Theresa Renée Eléna Delgado-Tossas (Tossas Cox adopted: Maculaitis)
4/6/2014 at 3:44 PM
Well, Grand, Deborah!!! Because, that is exactly, what I´ve been doing now, for about 3 years, intensively and 14 years, whenever I found time.
:-)

It would seem, we´re cousins, too!!!! Here is my Levi Smart

Levi "Lee" David SMART

If you could send me a link to your Levi, we can "merge" them!!!! And you´d be connected, with all of the rest of the SMART´s that I´ve been able to turn up, in time.

Nice to connect! So glad, you wrote to me!!!

xoxoxoxoRenée

Deborah Jean Ose/Smart
4/6/2014 at 6:37 AM
I am looking for info on my family. I am the daughter of Forrest Wayne Smart. His Father was Arthur Leroy Smart , who's father was Robert Lee Smart, then David Levi.

To be honest I really didn't expect a reply . I've only have had 2 since I started this journey 2 months ago. The first one led me to my grandfathers cemetery where I learn so many others are there. and the other one I was extremely surprised to find a sister of my mother who is also looking for my mother. Anyway I'm really intrigued about Jamima. I was wondering if there is more info on her. So far she is a mystery.
Thank you for your time,

Sincerly
Deborah Jean Ose (Smart)

Theresa Renée Eléna Delgado-Tossas (Tossas Cox adopted: Maculaitis)
4/6/2014 at 5:03 AM
What can I do for you?

Deborah Jean Ose/Smart
4/6/2014 at 2:55 AM
Managers of Jamima Smart (NN),

I am contacting you about this profile: Jamima Smart

Sincerely,

DEBORAH OSE

Jamima Smart
Previous 1 2

@ Would you like to know what I'm upset about? I'm upset because I wanted to have some time to let my family know some things I learned. i wanted to also share with them the adventure I was having, hoping they would want to be involved . I was greatly excited finding, once again, a new family member. I couldn't wait to tell my family. I mean how exciting is that. I blame myself for thinking I had found some one I could learn from, answer some of the many questions I had, and help me to understand how not to make mistakes as I did. When I expressed I needed some time, I didn't realize that was a yes answer to merging right at that moment. I simply needed to take care of some things, family wise. I needed to understand how it all worked. It was the timing which upset me. If you want, manage whoever I don't care. The damage is done. You've taken upon yourself to manage just about every one except for a few here and there. Even my Aunt Charlotte who started our tree. My father;s sister. Oh yeah I am "other."

Every time I go to research someone I feel like what's the point. So go a head, I have more important things to do . Besides no matter how and what you do they are still my family; That you can't take from me, I am not going to sit here and squabble anymore about something you will never understand.

Deborah Ose [Smart]

Deborah Jean Ose/Smart
and
Theresa Renée Eléna Tossas-Cox

I would like to ask both of you to take this discussion private..agree on who is going to message who and just click on the person profile and click on Send Message..this will then be between both of you not in the public as it is now..

Deborah, I´m really, sorry, you´ve taken this so far, as to sound like it´s some bitter war about who´s going to manage what profiles, as "first name" ... it is a co- management...

I have also, offered to erase, the profiles. If you feel like finding them, yourself... I´m totally, alright with that, too.

I did misunderstand, your telling me, it´s crazy at the moment and you´re notes and the mess and you need time... into a "I need help"... so, I tried to help, by not only sharing what I had researched the past 3 years on Smart... but also, by adding to your lines.

And you´re wrong... I think, I do get what the problem is... you weren´t aware that having common relatives on Geni and collaborating and having them in a family group, meant working together on it and you´d like to be sole manager of any persons, you knew and loved personally.
That´s alright and I can respect that and I apologize, for having adding anyone... unknowingly (after all, I´m good, but I´m not clairvoyant) who you would´ve rather added yourself.

It´s all good. We just need to talk, like normal human beings, constructively and in detail, about what exactly, one expects and wishes.

I am also, the baton carrier for my Aunt Norma and once, my Grandmother Eléna... for keeping the family together and keeping the family tree ALIVE. So, we do have more in common, than our SMART Ancestors.
Contrary to you though, I don´t care who´s managing what... just as long as, it´s connected to my stuff, too and not set to private and we can all share the information and the branches, likewise.

I´ve already mentioned it... but I will do all I can, to:

a. get you on as a manager and then, add you as the main- manager of these.

or
at your wish

b. simply erase the profiles I´ve added since 4 April 2014, around your immediate tree. Excluding, though, all SMART and connecting profiles, I had already added last year in August, before you even joined Geni or I had any knowledge of you.

I have added many profiles (not only Smart profiles), which are now also, merged with "other" people´s duplicate Main Profiles and am also, just one manager in a list of co- managers... under a main manager and sometimes, a curator...
That is just the way Geni works.

I didn´t ever want to squabble... with anyone. And I am not squabbling, now. We´ve found a really close cousin... here through Geni and I just wanted to connect and help... but you never answered me again and never asked me anything again...
and you blocked me or whatever, why I am not in your family group anymore (and so I can´t/as in I am not ABLE through GENI... it doesn´t give me your name to add to the managers list... even add you as a manager or make you the main manager, anymore... as we don´t seem to be working together/collaborating, anymore.)

And you never flat out said... "do not merge or connect our trees, yet"... you just said, "you had confusion in the tree and you had no time and didn´t understand exactly, what had gone wrong in "all" of your trees and you wanted to talk to some of your closer relatives about it..." etc.
I repeat, I was really, just trying to help take a load off of you.

I myself, was thrilled a year ago...when I added my Adams line back to 10 generations and someone picked up on it and added me to the Geni Big Tree, through a merge too...
(BTW- whoever did the merge didn´t ask me or contact me... they just merged them, but I didn´t mind... so, I don´t care that they didn´t. I woke up and was connected to 5000 people... it was an impressive shock, but I took it positively.)

I am really, hit hard and deeply, by this seemingly total misunderstanding and I am just trying to find a proper and good solution for us all...
(As, we aren´t the ONLY SMART Descendants, on Geni... there are a few more SMART cousins on here, just not as close to us in relationship, as we are to each other... if you go, up the tree... BTW and I am not even listed as manager at all, on most of those profiles... but they are connected/linked... through the mother, father, sibling, spouse, children links. And you will find... there isn´t much to research any more, once connected to the BIG Tree, except individual knotted/trouble points/spots on very long and wide branches, as there are literally, dozens if not more, who have been working on these lines... long before us... the most one can do, in many well researched branches here on Geni, is connect and for ones personal interest... click through and read where pertaining, the biographies on ancestors once unknown.. and as mentioned, collaborate on researching the still unknown, in these branches... as there is always still something... UNKNOWN... - maiden names of spouses, Parents, Siblings, Siblings Spouses etc. And that´s how the Journey continues.)

I know, we somehow, got off to a running start and landed directly, on a really bad foot... after that, Debbie, but do you think, we could try again?

You and I are, after all... 5th cousins, (FIFTH COUSINS!) from a scattered and endangered list of Smart descendants... shouldn´t we be "sticking together" and not alienating, one another?

I would really, like to try. Provided, you are willing.

Renée

Angus, I appreciate, the suggestion, but feel that we DO unfortunately, need a load of Curator assistance... to help us figure out, why I can´t add her as a manager to the profiles and why I can´t figure out how to surrender management to her, for some of the profiles, as well... etc. or I would have... yesterday, already.

And also, to avoid any further "private" misunderstandings... the Public, to act as a chaperon, of sorts.

Renée

I can be involved in the private messaging... if you both agree I can start.... It will be the three of us in the message let me know

Sounds like a plan, it may also be a good idea, to add a couple of the known SMART curators and/or other living relatives, to the discussion, so all who are involved in the Materia, can get an overview, to begin rectifying the situation. That would be great.

Thersa I am sorry you believe it's a war about managing. It is not. I had hoped it would be something to work together on . Learning from you, answering the many questions I had, and just being friends. I guess what upset me is you had gone on ahead without me. That hurt and I felt stupid thinking I had been duped. At the time what were you working on before I contacted you ? I'm sure I'm wrong butt it felt like you all of a sudden turned your direction on a different path. You didn't even allow me to work on anything with you. You just took off on your own. You didn't include me in best part, the researching Next thing I knew you had gone to full speed ahead. When I said give me a bit of time I didn't think three days was asking to much. Do you know how that made me feel? Do you know how it feels to go research a close family member and everyone of them are stamped with your name on them. You took away the fun of learning who each of these people were and having someone to have fun doing so. It made me feel you didn't care, I wasn't needed. You raced to each family member making them your own project. I felt you took advantage of me because I was new to all this. You didn't bother to wait to do anything with me. . You have know Idea how badly that made me feel.. I can understand your excitement I was thrilled to death. I had discovered another relative who was as eager as I had become. Every person I found as being related were very generous, assisting me and guiding me in right direction. Some have sent me pictures, While other shared there stories. The only thing they wanted in return was for me to continue where they had left off, including my Aunt Charlotte. Oh and a picture of my family and to stay in touch.

Look I know this is about connecting and sharing but you are missing the point. You didn't share the adventure of it at all. I tried talking to you about it but all you could say was if it bothered me we could have our trees separated. That's when I became angry. Now you make it sound like I can't play well with others and I being unreasonable. Dang it you broke my heart and made me feel I was being childish when I asked you why you started more or less without me. I was looking to you as a teacher, as I need to learn so much. I guess it is my fault to have assumed to have thought that way but I was excited. I'm sorry I let my anger get out of control. I'm usually easy to get along with but the disappointment deeply hurt.
Theresa I'm sorry I allowed this to happen but you are not the only victim here. And yes I handled this all wrong. But you weren't no peach either. The reason I blocked you was so I could get over being hurt and disappointed. Simply move on. Unfortunately every where I went your name was there, including my email. Boy did that sting. Like I said it made me feel like my nose was being rubbed in my own stupidity. My anger wasn't about who was managing, although "other" sounds a bit like whatever. It was about connecting with someone who was on the same journey only I felt I got left behind. So all I can say is I hope you can forgive me for my stupid behavior, I just wanted to be part of my families story because it's my story too.

You need to know this is not only about my fathers side of the family. It's about hopefully finding my mother and where she may be buried if she has passed. I haven't seen her since I was eleven. The information I learned which I needed to share with my family was something they needed to know before I could share with them the tree I was working on. Again I apologize for being a problem.

Thank you Debbie.

One more thing I don't want to change anything, for one I still have a lot to learn and I don't need to make more of a mess than I already have. And second being the manager on anything isn't important at least I don't think it is. When I stated that I didn't feel included it wasn't about being a manager.Like you said you have the experience, the last thing I would want is having you go behind me and cleaning up what I messed up. There are too many things I have no idea about how to do it or what is being asked , ect. I just wanted to belong and enjoy , like I said some one who not only enjoyed the journey but someone who would be willing enough to take my hand and teach me how to do it right . I am sorry I assumed something which wasn't expressed out right. I need to get going but if you could see your way to allow me to be your student and learn. Communicating better than we have, it would be something that I would honestly appreciate. It's all I really wanted. I am in the mist of some real life stuff so my time would be limited. but I am eager to learn. Let me know what you think. Debbie

P> S. The private session' I won't take part in. nor the public one as well. I won't allow being treated as the bad guy I am not. Making this a 3 ring circus tells me I'm seen as a problem. Someone who is rocking the boat so too speak, . Some one who is in the way. I can only apologize which I have. If there is no honesty or truly being sincere then there is no point in me being here.. I will not allow myself to be played for the sake of being wrong or right. If no one can see nor understand what I have expressed then it never will be. I am not a child although I do admit my behavior was childish, who needs to be punished. I've already mad ea fool out of myself which is punishment enough. i have let go of the anger, understanding clearly now. As much as I would like to continue my story here I believe maybe it would be best if I went else where to work on this adventure I have become addicted to. I am a grandmother who is raising 2 of my 8 grandchildren, and I've e been around the block more than I care to admit I'm not perfect but I'm not stupid either. What I saw after reading the messages for the second time, told me more than I care to say. I thank you Theresa for putting things in perspective, and once again I apologiize. . Excuse me for a moment. Sorry I didn't quite know if I had time to finish here. Anyway I will take my journey down another road, i think it would be best. It wouldn't be fair to Theresa. and I will be greatly busy with a new project I just received. So I thank you for tolerating me and I deeply apologize for being so disruptive. I guess you could say I get from the Smart side of the family. Thank you and please enjoy Theresa. Again I am sorry.

Sincerely
Deborah Jean Ose [Smart}
Just so you know their are 2 other Male Smarts and they have a son each. Unfortuneatly my older brother never had any children ,and let's hope one of my younger brother doesn't have anymore children. His son inherited the best of the genes in this family, his father may not get get lucky the next time.. lololol
Hopefully I will see all of you at the next family reunion, Some of the Smart have in Texas. After all that is where some of our ancestors ended up living at. Haven't had the chance to attend in quite some time since the passing of a lot of relatives. But I do know their is another group of smarts who have one every year. Hopefully I will be able to track them.. Good Luck And Good Bless.

Heij Deborah,

I loved your first two notes and then the last one, got me worried... again.
"Honest Johnson", No one is trying to make anyone a "bad guy".
Really, I also, just want to make this work... for both/all of us. Please, to not retreat or leave Geni.
I now, think I finally understand about what upset you... not sharing the journey...
I thought, I was, though... as when our tree grows and one adds whatever source material, one has found and or stories, to the "About" section of the profiles added and all others connected, are privy to see and share this (whatever it is, new found) information.
I am not sure, how to share the experience more closely... online and not in person. (me being in Germany... is a small hitch. with time zones and distance... ;-) )

I hope maybe, in time...I hope, sooner than, later, we´ll be able to get back together on this SMART thing.

I have already, relinquished quite a few profiles, to your sole management. In the hopes, that would resolve, the issue.

The last thing I wanted was to scare you away, by any means and I swear, I added all of the farther back SMART branch... a year ago... during my own researchings... I didn´t add all of them, including not my 2nd great grandmother Sarah Frances... just last april. (you can see that under this profile was added By: so and so On: June 2013)

I´m a really really fast typist and a speed reader and know a few graphic artist- tricks, to assist in extracting the information, I seek in long or numerous paged- documents, as well.

Plus, with the time difference... my life is also, just as turbulent, I´m afraid and time strapping, as well.. it is truly a labor of LOVE, the family tree and I give up, every spare moment I can find, to do it...

but when I´m at it... and have leads and things I can add... if I waited to do this I would

a. likely forget where I saw it and not know anymore where to find it...

b. just forget about it and get sidetracked by the few dozen other great mysteries in my branches and/or while giving other folks a hand at locating or figuring something out.

I´d love to collaborate on Jemima for example...
I also, still haven´t figured out who her parents are or what her maiden name was, etc... for example.

We need each other, each and every one of us, in the World... not only in our Smart World... but expecially, within the smaller circles.

Please, don´t leave and let´s get this ball rolling together.

I also, apologize, for anything and all I may have done to make you feel alienated. It was never my intention and I am sorry, for taking the baton and running off... a bit fast.

Please, also forgive me and let´s get this Family Together, huh?

xoxoxoxoxRenée

Oh and to answer your question, what I was working on, before you contacted me...

I was working on Cox/Norris/Presley/Pressley/Smart/Head branches of my maternal Grandfather.

the Medina/Domenech/Delgado/Betancourt,/Acevedo/Mejias/Lopez branches of my Husband´s tree.

And the Tosas/Puig/Scotti/Escalera/Estrella/Villafana/Gonzalez Branches of my paternal Grandfather and the Correa branches of my paternal Grandmother.
As well as dabbling, everywhere and anywhere, fate seemed to took me, in between. (with smart match notifications to my email... send me on a trail sometimes... which was cold, for a while... and I go with it.)

I hope that answers, what you wanted to know.

;-)

p.s. no one was seeing you as "the problem"

p.s. the intention of the "three ring circus"- private was so, we could have a curator (a professional Geni.com helper) to assist in getting the management things, changed and such, as I was unable to to anything... on them, about adding your or making your main profile manager. So your name was first and foremost, on the profiles.
I was able to just leave management, of the profiles, which I have done on many.
But I need for you to unblock me, so I can add you to your Aunt Bobby´s profile as manager... I can´t do this, otherwise.

And I feel, since you knew her and loved her, here on this earth in this lifetime... that you are the rightful manager...

As I´ve said before.. I began adding what I found, as I was just trying to take the load of researching and data entry, off of your back and I am really, really, sorry, for stepping on your toes, with that.

xoxoxoRenée